Dumpster fire, shit show, hot mess, crazy, whatever your go-to expression is, I have heard it over and over. Your business life and/or career is doing pretty well or even amazing but your life is a fucking mess.
There is no coincidence about this. You have been compensating for your ADHD your whole life. Because you have been living in a world designed for the neurotypical, you have created ways to thrive with your superpowers of ADHD in your business.
You use your skills of hyperfocus to complete the things you love to do. Your business is thriving because you aren’t bored and you are doing something you love!
1. Adulting is boring
Making appointments, cleaning, creating invoices, organizing and more are really not that interesting or exciting. Either you are bored or you get anxious by this list (or, maybe both). Realistically these items are not at the top of your list, and actually, oftentimes, don’t even make the list. You would rather spend your time doing anything else. So you don’t do the life things you “should” be doing.
2. Society is set up for NTs
This world we live in was not set up for the neurodiverse. It was definitely created for the neurotypical (NT). Things that you are “supposed” to do or “should” be doing is probably an NT thing. And if it isn’t just for the NT population, you were taught how to do it the NT way.
This includes learning how to take care of yourself. You most likely were taught how to take of yourself in an NT way. And, even the NT way isn’t great. To be honest, society does a pretty crappy job of teaching anyone how to lovingly take care of themselves. But, as an ADHDer, you were probably not taught how to take care of yourself with the way your brain works.
3. What boundaries?
I know, I know, the internet is saturated with content about creating boundaries. But, do you have boundaries? If you do, are you firm with them? Are there other boundaries you get to set?
These questions aren’t meant to bring shame, guilt, or judgment, They are merely questions for observation. It is likely that you still get to learn how to implement boundaries in your life that will support your ADHD.
There are definitely layers and more reasons why your life is a mess. I refuse to leave with you with just the why without any solutions. So here are a few things you can try out.
1. Outsource something
You may or may not be in a place to outsource something in your business but you are probably in a position to outsource some of your life.
You get to ask for help! You don’t have to do life all by yourself.
2. Take loving care of yourself
What is the one thing that connects you to yourself that you stopped doing? That’s the thing you get to do ASAP. Whether it is journaling, self-pleasure, exercising, yoga, meditation, running, dancing, reading, walking, listening to music, etc you know what supports you.
You get to ask for help! You don’t have to do life all by yourself.
3. Create Boundaries
Start with the boundaries you have already created and dropped and put them back into place. Then, over time, create new ones that will support you in getting your life together.
You get to ask for help! You don’t have to do life all by yourself.
If you need some support, ask. There are people in your life who love you and want to support you.
And there are people like me, who would love to connect with you and see if we are a good fit to work together.
In fact, I have a group coaching program called, ADHD Get Sh*t Done Bootcamp. If this would support you, leave a comment or message me so we can connect and see if you are a good fit for the program.
You got this, you magical, amazing , beautiful ADHDer!
Author of The ADHD Advocate Blog
I love to hear from my readers. Please feel free to email me or message me on Instagram.
hello@jessdubose.com
IG @coachingwithjess
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